Surprise!
by Peridot15
Summary: ONE SHOT. Ever wonder what Wolf would look like in a tutu?


**DISCLAIMER: ALEX RIDER IS AND NEVER WILL BELONG TO ME. ANTHONY HOROWITZ HOLDS ALL RIGHTS.**

* * *

Cub was mad.

Cub was mad because he didn't get his coffee that morning but also because Wolf yelled at him for _no freakin' reason!_ It was all Eagle's fault! Eagle dared the younger to beat him in a shoot off.

Being the man-er boy he is, Cub outshot the whole of K-Unit. They were pissed but Wolf stuck out like a sore thumb. He yelled, grumbled and threw a hissy fit at Cub just because he was fourteen!

If wasn't his fault that a teenager was a better marksman than him! Cub grumbled death threats. He would get back at Eagle later.

Now it's Wolf's turn.

Cub smirked maliciously and skipped off to plan a prank- er _spectacle_.

* * *

Cub couldn't wipe the smirk off his face.

Eagle and Snake eased away from him, not wanting to know what was on the younger's mind. The new recruit, Bear, just ignored the kid like he always did. He'd come to accept the teenager's presence, even if he bitterly disagreed with it.

But curiosity killed the cat and as well as the eagle and the snake.

Eagle, with Snake in tow, approached the young spy in hopes of learning what was going on with him.

Cub stared at him icily and replied, "And why should I tell you?"

Eagle was dumbfounded.

He and Cub were buddies, right? What did he do to upset that? They were the two youngest soldiers of the unit! They had to stick to together! And yet that did nothing to help Eagle who was still grappling for an answer.

Snake sighed behind him. This was going to be a _long_ day.

"Um….because I'm your buddy?" Eagle volunteered, unintentionally making it a question.

Cub just looked at him with his eyebrows raised.

Wrong answer.

Eagle tried again.

"Because I'm your…..commanding officer! Oh wait, shoot that's Wolf….." Eagle trailed off, thinking hard.

He needed to come up with a response! Eagle blinked. Wait what was he trying to come up with a response for again? He forgot.

Meanwhile, only Snake noticed how Cub cracked a smile at the mention of Wolf's name.

Now slightly suspicious, Snake asked, "Cub….? What did you-"

But before he could finish, the spy hurried off to who knows where.

Snake sighed.

He couldn't shake off the feeling that something ominous was going to happen.

Snapping out of his thoughts, he smacked Eagle over the head.

"Stop that. Your brain will explode."

Eagle responded with an indignant shout. "Hey, I take offense to that!"

* * *

Cub smirked.

All was in place.

He just needed Wolf to-_creak!_

Cub could have heard the sound of the old wooden door to the hut a mile away and still recognized it. So being the sensible spy he is when caught in the middle of _explicit_ activities, he hid.

He crept behind his cot, squatting until he was practically sitting on the ground. In the orderly hut resided four beds and a cot which belonged to him. All five sleeping areas were arranged in a horizontal line.

Wolf's bed was nearest to the door and Cub's was next to the wall farthest away from the door. There were no other rooms. The bathrooms and showers were elsewhere.

Cub's smirking brown eyes peaked over the top of his cot just barely, looking cautiously for the intruder. His smirk widened when he saw K-Unit's leader. Wolf trudged in with a frown on his face, his black hair glued to his forehead in sweat.

Someone had gotten a workout today.

Cub watched discreetly as he collapsed on the bed in a rare time of weakness. Pretty soon the man was snoring away.

Cub smirked.

Tonight was the night.

* * *

Normally Wolf wouldn't be the first one to fall asleep.

No, out of all his fellow soldiers, the honor fell to Eagle. So it was a surprise when he woke the next morning to a hut full of snoring soldiers, minus Cub.

The teenager slept as light a feather, not making a sound. Wolf allowed himself a yawn before his discipline came to surface.

It forced him to get out of bed, no matter how exhausted he felt. He was treated to the croak of the old uncomfortable bed as he swung his legs over.

He was about to stand as planned when he saw his hairy legs staring back at him.

His eyes widened, alarmed.

_What the hell? I went to bed in my uniform didn't I?_

Very confused and if not a little put off, he examined the rest of his body.

And screamed at the top of his lungs like a little girl.

* * *

Cub smirked and smirked some more.

He'd been watching Wolf the whole time. The scream had alerted the other SAS soldiers, startling them awake.

Eagle even fell off of his bed!

But even Eagle's groans did nothing to take the attention away from the unit leader. Wolf's horrified and frightened face stripped away all of his dignity and left the SAS soldiers gasping for breathe as they fell to the floor laughing.

Wolf was all decked out like a ballerina.

His upper body was sporting a tiny hot pink tutu that fell short right in the middle of his hairy thighs. The SAS soldiers howled on the floor as they caught sight of what the tutu said, 'Mama's little girl'.

The tutu had puffed out sleeves that stopped at the shoulders, frilly and tacky in all its right. But what left the unit mates sprawled on the floor, clutching their splitting sides was the fact that Wolf's terrified face was covered in poorly drawn makeup.

Red lipstick smeared on his cheeks and blush was freckled on his forehead. Mascara drenched the area around his eyes, as if he had been crying.

Cub and Eagle howled like a pack of dogs on the floor, reveling in their unit leader's embarrassment.

But nothing ever lasts for long and pretty soon Wolf came to his senses.

His makeup ridden face morphed into a glare so intense Eagle yelped, "Mama!"

He glared murderously at his unit mates who were quickly clambering onto their feet. They gulped with the exception of Cub who watched the proceedings with barely contained amusement.

When all the previously howling soldiers were at attention, Wolf growled in an eerily calm tone, "Who was responsible for this?"

Silence.

The soldiers shook like leaves, except a smirking Cub.

Who knew Wolf sporting a tutu would have been so fun? He should have done this earlier!

Wolf continued, "Alright, then. All of you will do one hundred laps around the camp _unless_ I know who did it! Am I clear, K-Unit?"

The soldiers gulped but nevertheless responded, "Sir, yes, sir!"

Cub, feeling particularly anti-laps, smiled viciously as an idea implanted itself in his evil head.

"Eagle, fess up. I saw you slipping that drug in Wolf's dinner."

Eagle squawked as Wolf hurled on him.

Cub smirked.

He'd killed to birds with one stone.

"Eagle…." Wolf threatened ravenously, stepping towards the quivering man.

With each step forward Wolf took, Eagle followed suit back.

"I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't-"

But Eagle's wails were lost when a fist made contact with a jaw.

"YOU WILL PAY FOR THIS EAGLE YOU NO GOOD SON OF A B-"

* * *

XD I'm evil, I know. I had SO~ much fun writing this! I mean Wolf in a tutu? *cracking up* Too good to be true! Lol So PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE review and tell me what you thing of this short one shot! xD

~Peridot15:)


End file.
